Information learned from the zoo

I went to the Toronto Zoo and they have signs all over the park that tell you about the animals and also how to protect yourself from them.
In the center of the zoo, they had this list of rules that tells you about the animals.
1. If confronted by a Lion - make yourself really tall and scream.
2. If confronted by a Tiger - throw rocks in the opposite direction and stay really still.
3. If confronted by a Cougar - buy her a drink, tell her she looks twenty two, and wear a condom.