Mines getting too fat, independently of myself, it does what it wants. And it makes getting dressed a challenge,... my pants are so tight now, my farts are getting louder... I own one suit, not even a good one,.. its a George Foreman.. and I only own a suit cause it came with my grill.
People actually come up to me in the grocery store and ask me where the junk food is. Seriously.. "Hey man, where are the Joe Louis?"
"Doesn't matter man.. I have them all!"
One of my friends is always trying to help me loose weight by asking me stupid questions.. "Hey Brad, loosing weight is not hard, you just have to watch what you eat.. like what did you have for breakfast this morning.?"
"Cereal."
"Nice, how many bowls did you have?"
"I don't know, how many come in a box?"
I am a comic that thinks outside the box.. after everything is gone from inside it. I was born without that filter that keeps certain thoughts inside, and most times, it pops out at the worst moments.. its going to happen, so best be prepared for whatever is about to come out.
