I am a comic that thinks outside the box.. after everything is gone from inside it. I was born without that filter that keeps certain thoughts inside, and most times, it pops out at the worst moments.. its going to happen, so best be prepared for whatever is about to come out.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

On Line Dating

My friends convinced me to try online dating so I tried that...

everyone says their friends convinced them to try it.. everyones a lier cause you do that on your own, late at night when no one is watching. Its like looking at porn, you don't want to get caught looking at that site, ever!

Women write some funny shit on their profiles.. stuff like "I am an outgoing lady looking for an outgoing guy"

Bullshit, we are both in front of the computer on a Friday, who are you lying too?

Women are deceptive with their photos too... you see one thing online and then you see them in the coffee shop and its like Ohhh.. Eeee! Well,..... still going to fuck her!

I did POF, anyone else here do that? No? over 100 thousand people on there, but I am the only one from Ottawa.. nice.

So let me tell you how it works, you put your information on the Internet, and then you do this 50 question survey... and then the Internet will send you matches weekly with whom it thinks is a match for you based on those questions.

So far the Internet has been a bit of a dick about it.

I am not getting good matches is all I am saying.. ok.. its like I get "Hey Brad, I see you like to sit on the couch and watch movies.. maybe you should send this woman with a lazy eye that never shuts up a message cause you wont want to take her out in public."
"Wait, we also see that you like to go to bars every now and then so maybe you would like this woman who is a 2 at 10 but at 2 she is a ten.... ohh and she is a slight alcoholic..."

Internet dates are tough, if you have never been on one.. its weird right from the start cause you met online, that's not normally how you meet people. So at the start of the date you are like "Ahh ok.. sooo whats wrong with you? Cause I got alot of stuff going on with me that I left off the profile. I see you may have left a few things off as well... like for instance.. when did you loose that ear? How do your glasses stay on? When were you going to tell me you were in a wheel chair?"

My Peeps....