Its great to live in this day in age when you can just write something to someone and remind them of things to do, or what needs to be picked up, or what time you think your going to be home. Thats all well and good.... but there is still one thing that needs to be kept in person and left alone.
Keep drunk dialing to drunk dialing. Drunk texting will only lead to chaos.
My girlfriend went out with some of her friends for a "ladies night"... no biggy,.. I went out with the fellas.
Plan was to meet back at the house "when ever" and just go out for a good night on the town.
Well,.. somewhere in there... my girlfriend got a little drunk. And she decided to tell me that.
I got a text message from her saying "Hwat is up? whree are you guys? I tink your a sexyy best!"
So I wrote her back, "Thanks"
Its a text message, not a conversation keeper. Use it like the US uses the Marines. Get in, get out.
So I got another text message from her "No, tell me somehing hot. I cant wait to get you home! hWat do you want me to do to yu?"
Dirty talking, great fun,,..... dirty texting,.. remorse will set in and you will be reminded of what you write.
So I wrote her back "I cant wait to get you on the bed and take you"
"Take me whree? I want to blow you!" is what I got back.
Ok, so I am thinking, I want to get her mind going, but my phone was equiped with this "Txt word" option where it figures out your word that you typing and you select the right one that matches.
So what I wrote her back was "I want to kick your puppy! You would like that wouldn't you"
What I thought I wrote was "I want to lick your pussy"
So the next message did not make sence to me. I opened my phone and read 'Why dont you like cuddles"
Cuddles was her dog.
I went to bed alone, sexless, ........... and never lived down the fact she thought I wanted to kick her dog.
Conclussion: Disable Txtword on your phone, dont drunk text and save the dirty talking to person to person, over over the phone. It only leads to chaos.
I am a comic that thinks outside the box.. after everything is gone from inside it. I was born without that filter that keeps certain thoughts inside, and most times, it pops out at the worst moments.. its going to happen, so best be prepared for whatever is about to come out.
