**Just a little FYI on this one,.. think of yourself at a comedy club,.. then read this, other wise, it makes no sense.**
You win ladies.... you fucking win.
Think of your man right now,.. and let me speak on behalf of him.
He loves you... he does... with all his heart, he loves you, he loves you, he loves you.
He wakes up every morning and thinks,.. "How can I keep this crazy bitch happy?"
Cause your NEVER happy!!
You can only complain.... "We never go out!"
Bitch... YOUR OUT!
"Yeah, but its not a date."
Really? then you pay.
He loves you,... especially if he is here with you tonight... cause trust me, he could be out having fun... making his own decisions.
But he is not, he is here with you,... in the shirt that YOU picked out.
"Hey why don't we go out with my brother tomorrow night?"
He does not like your brother, OK... He has his OWN friends that he wants to go out with.
Don't get me wrong, OK... I love women,.. I do. Your all full of shit, but your fun.
Remember when you were fun? Remember,.. the beginning of the relationship.
When you were setting your 'trap'. Guys can attest to this. Married guys anyway.
Remember when you used to let us pick the spot to go to,.. and after a little while we would always here this "Lets Party!! WOOO!" or "Your friends are awesome... they are so fun."
Six months later... "He's a dick! That guy is rude! Johnny always sleeps with my friends!"
My personal favorite,.. "How much do you plan to drink tonight? How much have you had! When is enough enough?"
When I pass out,... that's when I have had enough.
But ladies,.. and you know who you are. I have to hand it to you..... you are the only ones that can say "Fuck you asshole" with out saying a word.
We say see you later,.. and then you let us have it...
its very simple.. not alot of action...just a simple "See you later..." and the squinty eyes, big cheek smile, and the little head shake from left to right.
I am a comic that thinks outside the box.. after everything is gone from inside it. I was born without that filter that keeps certain thoughts inside, and most times, it pops out at the worst moments.. its going to happen, so best be prepared for whatever is about to come out.
